"Unseasonable" – 11/11/20
Ever since my surgery
I "suffer" hot flashes
When I get especially stressed
I am my own self-contained
Tropical vacation; I try to look
At it as an ever-unexpected bonus
I notice also that the 20 some odd
Supplements a day I take for
This and that, as recommended,
Become akin to a traffic jam
As unsexy as taking out the garbage
(Unless you're Debbie Gibson
Instagramming it all in sequins & heels)
The ones for bone-loss, the ones
For free-radicals, the ones for immunity
And so on and so forth they stare at me
Guiltily, metaphors for the license I let expire
Years ago for the publishing deal
I should have signed for the wherewithal
I never had to auto-refine the certain "no"
I am a work in progress like everyone
Why is it I elicit the impression that
My lack of routine, focus, confidence
Is a sign of someone who doesn't
Strive to be someone she is not yet?
I have always had a hard time with unbridled
Compliments they loom like kites
Caught in trees, ephemeral, and largely
Out of reach and yet in my more down
Phases, moon-like I yearn for the grounded
Assurance of a confidante's praises
Covid-19 came in like a bull and there is
No chance, it would seem, it will go out
The least bit like a lamb half-dozen friends now
I've buried but what I will say to you, my heart, is that
Candles are metaphors for what can, barring wind,
Be lit again and so I fan myself
From G-d's unseasonal sense of humor
And try to remember what it's like
To not be so damn humorless
And take my pills and stretch my limbs
And do jumping-jacks in my luckiest dress