"Avoidance" - 7/13/20

Firstly, we are all survivors
Whatever the case may be, there is no question
We are all surviving something, many things
Give me strength today therefore to remember
That when a bright beautiful candle-lit soul passes
Through pain and into the next phase of no longer
Longing, it is not my burden to carry empathically

Just because the word 'I' comes before "am'
And someone else may no longer be does not mean
I must be a prisoner to potential sadness or that love
Cannot take a new shape transcending expectations
Bad news is sycophantic for the most part sourced
From leaches who weren't paying attention when news
Was good forgiveness is universal we all understand

Pangs of regret but some have more of a
Penchant than others for imagining worse case
Scenarios and we have our reasons locked up
In this attic someone's been weighing risk factors
While imagining the fear she will feel when she finally
Follows up taking care of herself in preventive tense
Eventually it will become a matter of common sense

I picture a beautiful gifted beloved wonderful woman
Surrounded by her family her life cut short by a twisted
Insidious unmitigated stranger of a curse no time
Left to do anything but take the stage last words
Unrehearsed last love-letter arrested mid-verse
I talk to my loved-ones we discuss when my next test
Will be I can't put it off indefinitely serenity is destined

To elude the free will you linger with me indefinitely
My heart breaks for the family my skin stings with
Eventually the only way to overcome fear is to face it
Head on dead on defeat it with focus preparation
Meditate through it breathe it away with the promise
Of someday I know the right thing to do is go to my
Appointment luxury of opportunity must supersede

The trepidation I feel or the reservations I have
About walking into a battle-ground resounding hope-
Lest I forget merely months ago clinging by a thin rope
I was in a similar position 'the size of a plum' was the
Phrase used to describe, to assess the dire situation
I look in the mirror and do my best to honor a woman's
Last breath I admired with the greatest miracle of all